A Blogger's Guide To Budgeting Criticism

Welcome back to Part 3 of the A Blogger's Guide To Budgeting Series. You can view Parts 1 and 2 if you need to catch up, but today, lets talk about Criticism. It's a touchy subject but it's something we all deal with. How we react to it however, will show the world our true colors and therefor must be handled with care. Below are 5 things to consider before reacting to criticism and will benefit in the long run, and potentially help you react professionally and not out of spite.

1. People Talk
Let's face it: If you're trying to do anything that is over or above what's necessary to live, people are going to have a thing or two to say about it. Sometimes it's those who are nearest and dearest to you but more often than not it's complete strangers who must see to it that you have heard from them before you can make a single move. Either way, this is a risk we take by vocalizing our thoughts on the internet. We are subjecting ourselves to the opinions and comments of others. If you can't handle it, get out while you can.
2. Heavy Burdens
I've spent numerous days, even weeks sulking over what some people have chosen to say about myself and my craft. Most of the negative comments I get I'm able to brush off, but some have really cut deep. It left me with that deep heartache, that pit in my stomach that says You're such a joke, You've failed and even more drastic People hate you. They're all lies. It's difficult to not take them personally because of course they're directed at you personally, but do they really matter? That is what you need to ask yourself when looking criticism in the eye. More often than not they don't. Don't let the comments weigh you down, instead... do something about it.
3. Let Them Eat Cake
People will always talk. Gossip is human nature and the pure fact that people are talking should not make you uneasy. You've put yourself out there on the internet and people will critique what you show them. Positive and negative options are how we grow and learn and create identities. Do not be immediately guarded or upset when you catch word that someone has an opinion of your work, instead open your ears to it.
Identify what people are saying. Is it constructive criticism?? That is the most helpful thing to be able to extract from a reader. It's honest, pure and unbridled. Without any constructive criticism you will not know how readers feel about the content you are producing on your blog. If people are all saying the same thing (ie. that was rude, mean, dramatic, etc) maybe they're right and you need to re-evaluate the way you're portraying yourself. OR if you aren't willing to change in any way, you need to find a new audience who will be accepting of the cometary, topics and your point of view.
If people are being downright rude, this also needs to be dealt with. Emotionally, that one comment can outweigh the hundred positive you may get. My rule: don't over analyze it. Be frank with yourself. Tell yourself it's a lie and brush it off.
4. Professional vs. Protective Reactions
When the time comes for reacting to criticisms, often our instinct is to lash out. DON'T! Put it on the shelf for a day or two, and don't touch it. Let yourself separate the emotional reaction from the reasonable reaction and then decide what is best. Many would say to confront the issue with the person head on. This may be the way you need to handle it, but don't go about it publicly. Find a way to handle the issue in private. Send an email expressing how you were hurt by their actions and explain why. Don't play a victim, play a human being. 9 times out of 10 you will hear an apology or reasoning to why something was said. This will make both parties feel heard, respected and both are able to move forward.
For some of us, handling conflict is harder than actually resolving an issue. Sometimes, ignoring an issue is the best possible solution. I would use this strategy for anything that is overly offensive, unreasonable or demanding. Often times these people want things done their way or they'll throw a fit. So let them throw a fit, while you play the bigger person.
5. Safe Zones
Most importantly of all- listen to your own instincts. As a blogger, small business owner or part-time crafter it's important to sift through the input of outside onlookers and listen to your own inner voice, aka your instincts. You are in charge of what you do, you can't point a finger in this online world. If you are finding it hard to decide what to do in stressful situations, or moments of adversary, listen to yourself, be your own moral compass.

I hope this helps some of you out there who are continually in the line of fire. Chin up, and know that if people are caring at all you're doing something right. xxoo Chelsea

{A Blogger's Guide To Budgeting Money}

Welcome back! Today, I wanted to share Part 2 of my 3 Part Advice Series: A Blogger's Guide To Budgeting. Today's Topic: Money (insert ooh's and awe's here). Yes, a challenging subject with no simple answers but I've broken it down for you. Below are my rules for obtaining a super blogger status without breaking your piggy bank... and maybe how to save a few pennies or nickles at that! Enjoy and good luck to all.Rule #1: The Dress Doesn't Make the Girl

You're probably saying, "yeah, duh," but let's be honest. We've all seen the lovely fashion bloggers who continually are wearing the most incredible clothes. We drool over every single shoe, clutch and accessory. I often find myself thinking that if I could have that incredible wardrobe I would seem more desirable to a greater audience. FALSE!

Some of my favorite (might I add very successful) bloggers never post photos of their fashions or of their belongings. I know that my personal style and the wardrobe currently in my closet are not my dream clothes but they are a great reflection of who I am. At one time I bought those clothes because I liked them and feeling confident in my own wardrobe is very important. It's like desiring to be blonde when you're a brunette; everybody does it, but it all comes down to the choices you're making that are a true reflection of who you are. I guess the point of this rule is to make it clear that you can have the most ingenious collection of clothing and an incredibly ugly soul. It's really more important to focus on being pure of heart and kind and positive, than to be a supreme stylista. This in itself should encourage you that you've got a good thing going on already.. now, how to build on that solid foundation



Rule #2: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle

Yep. Just like cardboard, paper and glass we should be recycling our clothing. This can be a huge money saving technique when done properly.

Reducing the items of clothing you own will actually benefit your wardrobe. By removing the items that are overly worn, don't fit or are poor quality will remove the desire to wear them. This will leave room for the amazing items you do have, force you to wear them and show you what items you lack that you do in fact need.

Reusing your clothing can be as easy as 1, 2, 3. Cut it, sew it, dye it! Enhance old clothes by doing some custom DIY work, whether it means cutting the neck off that ratty old sweatshirt you love so much, or dying that white slip green to wear as a dress, the possibilities are endless!

Recycling clothes is becoming easier and easier. There are a growing number of consignment stores that will take your used clothing and sell it for you, giving a large percentage of the profits back. It's a great way to keep the size of your closet modest while being able to afford new pieces to spice up your wardrobe.



Rule #3: Trend or Timesake?

This rule is the most important on the list. Let's get honest now... many of us fall into the trend trap. We bought those jelly shoes, the chain belt or that teeny tiny clutch that won't even fit your phone - it's inevitable to have fashion faux pas but learning from our mistakes will benefit us in the future. Here's how you do it: Keep up with the trends by purchasing garments that agree with the current fashion colors and shapes. Keep from becoming a walking billboard by ensuring that you wear no more than 1 trendy item at a time. Mix your trendy items with your classic cut, well tailored fashion... you can't go wrong! Now, a little visual to explain what you should be spending on Trendy vs. Timesake pieces:

Rule #4: Think To The Future

Like everyone, our tastes mature. When shopping, always ask yourself if you will like it in the future. I often channel my style icons Brigitte Bardot and Rachel Zoe while shopping. Doing so, helps me realize that no, this really doesn't go in the direction I'd like to dress....it keeps things in perspective. Take the time to search for classic pieces that will last for years - a lovely cashmere sweater, some great fitting pumps and a pencil skirt are all staples that are fun and flirty but can grow with you as time passes. Thinking ahead can save you so much money now and in the future.



Rule #5: Fake or Faux??

Just like the dress doesn't make the girl, the label doesn't make the dress. Sure we all lust over the new Marc Jacobs collection and it's so much better when it's real, right? WRONG! You don't need to fork over the big bucks to look like you're wearing designer labels...it's all about smart shopping. Please don't get me wrong; as an aspiring designer myself, I feel incredibly magical when holding a $3ooo dress and would probably sell my car for some McQueen platform heels, but when it comes down to reality, I can't afford to wear all Rodarte and not max out a million credit cards. If labels are that important to you, save up for one or two items of the latest and greatest fashions. Don't buy unless you can afford it that day. If labels really don't matter and you just want to be in style, look for items that resemble designer fashions. It doesn't mean you're cheap, it means you're smart.



Rule #6: Paper or Plastic?

I cannot say this enough: PAY.IN.CASH! It's so easy to rack up debt by charging all your purchases on a credit card. Paying in cash gives you a physical idea of what you are spending, and when it's gone, it's gone! It's the most practical way to save money. If you have a problem keeping all your weekly or monthly cash in a large bunch inside your wallet, separate your money into envelopes. Each envelope should be labeled appropriately, ie. Gas, Entertainment, Food, Emergencies, etc. Breaking up your spending money will keep your shopping habits in perspective and allow you to eat all month long, and not just until your money runs out (been there)!

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Best of luck to you all, in your Fall Fashion Shopping highs and lows. I know it can be tough but being smart with your money will benefit you in the future. Keep that dream car or house in mind when you're window shopping, and tuck away as much as you can. Indulge when you deserve it, and most of all, do not ever let your clothing define you. I hope this has been helpful for you all!

xxoo chelsea

{A Blogger's Guide To Budgeting Time}

You've practiced spring cleaning to simplify your life, why not practice some fall time budgeting?! It's much easier than rearranging your wardrobe and all you have to do is read! I have created a set of rules for any blogger who really needs help managing their time. Just a few helpful hints from one ocd blogger to all of you... good luck!Rule #1: Identify Your Goals
What do you want from your blog? Do you have a specific demographic that you'd like to reach? How about an age group? What do you want to write about? Once you've decided on this criteria, create one long term goal for your blog. Next, set small yet reasonable short-term goals that will eventually lead you to your end goal. My personal long term goal is to be self-employed. Each time I complete a short term goal I reward myself in one way or another. It's incredible to look back and see how far I've come and how much closer I am to my end goal then when I first began blogging. It's also saved me the frustration of not knowing what my future holds. I'm creating my own future and it's wonderful.

Rule #2: There's Personal and then there's Private
It's a fine line to walk, but one that is very important. Telling the world wide web personal information about yourself is expected from a blogger. How old you are, your major in school, what you drank at your favorite coffee shop, you get the gist. These are things you could also tell an employer, acquaintance or someone on a first date. These bits of information make you who you are and allow you form friendships and relationships. They form trust - the most important aspect of lifestyle blogging. Your readers will feel comfortable and begin caring about you and the events you share with them. Be honest and get personal.
Private facts are delicate pieces of information, that contain an emotional connection. These details are ones you share with your best friend, boyfriend or your parents. Frankly, private information will only make readers feel uncomfortable. No one wants to hear (or needs to know) about your cramps, a fight with your friend or how unhappy you are with your body. It's all in the phrasing, for instance:

You have been really upset lately because a family member has taken ill. Instead of sharing the details of this private matter, communicate to your readers that you are having family struggles and ask for them to keep you in their prayers or good thoughts. Update them on the progress by saying that things are looking up and that you're grateful for all the kind things they've been saying, etc. This is appropriate and gets that weight off your chest. You are being open and it could explain certain behavioral traits you evoke on your blog.

Again, it's all in the phrasing. Get it? Good! Knowing the difference between personal and private information will cut your blogging time in half. Ideas will be more focused and direct. You'll be able to write more blogs, in less time with a more enjoyable reading experience.

Rule #3: Separate your blog from other areas of your life
This may seem like one of the hardest rules to honor. I've been there, toting around my camera to coffee with friends, just itching to get the perfect picture to show what I did over the weekend. On occasion, I'll get it. Most of the time however, it's a complete distraction and an unnecessary obligation I put upon myself. Here's the truth: Your blog is not your life! It should not interrupt your time with family, friends or from doing the things you enjoy most of all. When I began blogging, I felt the divided when it would come down to spending time with family or writing a blog post I had committed to post on a weekly schedule. So what did I do? I budgeted my blog time and here's how.

• Make a list of all your obligations, ie. work, classes, etc. I know that I work on weekdays anywhere between 40-60 hours each week. This is a large chunk of my time that is marked unavailable.
  
• Now, mark your free time according to the spaces in your Obligations list. I know that I have free time from 6-11pm on weeknights, all day on Saturday and Sunday.
• Mark the time you are willing to work on your blog. I do not want to waste my Friday nights or Saturday blogging when I can be out with friends, enjoying the vintage stores, and playing around town. I have chosen to work on my blog on Sunday afternoons (after I sleep in and clean the house) and Monday evenings (while I watch Gossip Girl, hehe).

This is how I created my own custom schedule. It keeps my life on track and allows me to complete my obligatory tasks, enjoy being around friends and family and I also get some me time. Since creating my blog schedule I have yet to feel trapped by my blog. It's been a huge weight off my shoulders.

Rule #4: Keep Track of Your Ideas
Once or twice a month take some quiet time for yourself to brainstorm. Let your mind be open and jot down what comes to mind in a notebook. Once you have a page full of ideas, go through and narrow it down to ideas you love. These ideas are the materials you can use to frame your blog posts. Don't follow the trends, start them! If some ideas don't pan out, keep them in your notebook for the future...you never know when an idea will develop. I can't tell you how many times I've lost a great idea for lack of writing it down. I learned my lesson. Your ideas after-all, are why you blog - keep track of them! Focusing a little time and energy into brainstorming will save you time and energy in the future. You'll be surprised how fast and fun this can make the process.

Rule #5: Are You Having Fun Yet?
Do you remember why you began blogging? I imagine the point was to bring some level of joy to your life. Take a moment and be honest with yourself - are you having fun yet? If the answer is yes, keep up the good work! If your answer is no, however, it's time to switch things up. Nothing is harder than attempting to write a blog you're unenthusiastic about. It's time to re-evaluate your blog content. Focus on things you're good at, things you love and things that inspire you. No way you can go wrong with passion and conviction in your tone. Whenever I write about something I'm excited about, I tend to fly through the post. I love seeing the feedback people give and it brings real joy to my blog life.

Obviously all these time budgeting rules are my personal opinions, but as I see many of my friends struggling with maintaining the commitments they've made I wanted to take a crack at easing their burden. Take a risk, grab a journal and see how setting up your own blog budget can benefit you and pave the way to a bright blog future! Happy planning!
xxoo chelsea